Friday, March 18, 2011

FIGHT!!

Last night/this morning at about 02:00 I was awakened by the neighbors below us. We rarely visit the people who live directly below us (and by rarely I mean never) as opposed to our neighbors that live in the apartment to our left or right. I don’t know much about them other than the fact that it is a female who has one male toddler. She lives by herself but has her boyfriend over to spend the night on occasion.

Last night she fought with her boyfriend. Loudly, not physically but verbally, and here are some of my observations about said fight.

1) The “F bomb”, I don’t think so many bombs had dropped since operation Rolling Thunder in Vietnam.
2) The repeated question, “What the F* did I do!?!”
3) “Get out!” “go sleep on the couch!”
4) Yelling

After listening to them fight last night I realized how well Kaci and I fight. Granted we are not perfect and are still working on how to fight with each other we still have a basic concept of how to fight. Here are some of our rules… (although they aren’t official we try to stick by them as best we can)

1) No yelling (although I do raise my voice sometimes, mostly when I am frustrated, but I don’t yell)
2) No swearing (duh)
3) Listen (again duh)
4) Admit when you are wrong
5) Stay on topic, no jumping around, address the issue at hand, if there are other issues save it for another (more appropriate) time.

Kaci and I don’t “fight” very often, although we do have some disagreements, we do our best to listen and try to understand one another. Kaci is really good about not letting things that bother her fester which helps our relationship a lot.

Plus I think it helps that we are 100% committed to one another and not simply sleeping together. I think that when you are committed you tend to look at arguments and disagreements with more of a long term perspective in mind.

Some great advice that was given to me by Ryan “Elder” Tow was learn how to fight, it makes sense, I mean sooner or later you will fight about something, and it is best to know how to fight when the situation arises. (so you don’t wake up your neighbors at 2:00am)

Lata,
Ryan

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